Holy crap.

You know what’s not cool?  Indecisiveness.  You know whose indecisive?  Me.

I don’t know what it is, but I can never make a decision and stick with it.  NEVER.  NEVER EVER.  And it’s not like I am talking about which outfit I am going to wear to work today, I am talking about my marriage.  Yup, my marriage.  The one that has been on the fritz for two years.  I’m starting to think that maybe it was once on the fritz, but it no longer is and it’s all just made up in my head.  Id like to answer my own questions, because I do seem to always have the answer… but I’m pretty sure the lack of a college degree disqualifies me from solving my problems myself.

I love him.  Always have and always will.  I think my problem is, is that sometimes I don’t want to.  Honestly?  I wouldn’t even be worrying about this shit, but I am.  Why? 

My period is late.

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4 responses to “Holy crap.

  1. First time reader, Doobylove. Found you after you commented on my blog, and whoa! That’s some news you have there. I’m going to go ahead and congratulate you on the biggest accomplishment/challenge of your life. I hope you find the peace in your marriage that you need so you can fully enjoy this miracle for what it is, or come to terms with things as you need to. I’ll be checking back! 🙂

  2. Maybe you are late because of the stress of worrying about your marriage. The good news is that at least you are still sleeping with him or else this wouldn’t be a problem right? I have always heard that if you focus on something it gets bigger than it is. I personally like to make mountains into mole-hills. “No, no, it’s nothing, my arm will grow back…” That sort of thing. Good luck. I’m intrigues by your blog and will be back.

  3. I want to be supportive of the idea that your marriage is fine…but I’ve seen what you’ve written (and knowing that’s not the whole story and only a snippet) I don’t think it was a healthy dynamic to begin with…uh – things will work out one way or another whether your future holds two lines or just one. But don’t get back into that marriage because of a second line, get back in beacuse you want to.

  4. Oh my god. I freak out if my period is five minutes late. Glad to see the update 🙂

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